Confessions

"I wish that I can be where you are
That I may lace my fingers with yours,
That I may rest my forehead against yours,
That I may stare into the very depths of your soul.

"I wish that I can be where you are
That I may run my fingers through your hair,
That I may rest my cheek against your breasts,
That I may listen to the steady beating of your heart.

"I wish that I can be where you are
That I may bare myself to you,
That I may lose myself inside you,
That I may drown with your endless beauty.

I wish that I can be where you are
While I still have the chance,
While I still have the time,
While I still have breath within my frail body."

Three dreaded words were waiting to greet her upon her arrival at the hospital. She knew what the man was going to say, the somber expression declaring far more than necessary.

"You're too late."

She made no attempt to speak but let her hand rest upon his shoulder. She stared at the dark circles surrounding his eyes, the deep lines marring his face. Like her, he hadn't slept in days. Unlike her, he had actually been there.

"Was she-"

"In pain." He was curt, angry, and shrugged her hand off. "Whenever the medicine wore off and her mind cleared of haze, she'd start to cry. She never wailed, just so you know. Her tears came silently in torrents. The nurses would often comment how her pillows were soaked by the time they got around to giving her her medication"

"Was she that sick?"

"The physical pain she managed to take, but the doctors don't seem to have a prescription for heartache. If you ask me she died of a broken heart, the disease was secondary." His tone accusing.

"Oh."

He glared at her, "Is that all you have to say for yourself?"

"What can I say?" She snapped, her hand balling into fists.

"That you at least tried to get here on time. That you at least wanted to get here before she left. God knows all she wanted was to see you one last time. I guess you just never cared what happened to her." He turned his back to her.

"And what makes you think she even wanted to see me?" When he didn't answer, she started to leave for the exit.

"She asked to be buried with the teddy bear you gave her."